Look, I'm not a historian (an historian?), so I can't even begin to pretend that I know what Labor Day is all about. Is it a day for women who have given birth? Is it a day we're supposed to spend laboring?
I don't know. And I have to be perfectly honest: I'm not willing to Google it.
I am, however, willing to post GIFs of kids getting wrecked:
Do yourself a favor and check out this collection of kid fail GIFs.
Now that we got that out of our systems, lemme get back to this whole Labor Day thing. We've got a little bit of a sale happening at DBH.
That's right: A LABOR DAY SALE!!! (Yelling so Google puts this on the front page when people search 'awesome things.')
'What is this'¦what do you call it? Labor Day Sale?' - You
'It's a sale. For Labor Day. A Labor Day Sale.' - Me
Here's how it works: Enter promo code CHILLOUT at checkout to get 15% off all orders, 20% off when you spend $75 or more, and 25% off when you spend $100 or more! Plus, if you spend $75, we'll throw in free shipping. It's pretty much one of those 'no duh' situations.
In the words of Billy Mays, 'THAT'S NOT ALL!'
This sale doesn't end on Labor Day. No, no. It goes all the way through September 13th.
(These sales will affectionately be known as One Day After Labor Day Sale, Two Days After Labor Day Sale, Three Days After Labor Day Sale, Four Days After Labor Day Sale, Five Days After Labor Day Sale and Six Days After Labor Day Sale.)
Do yourself a favor and get ya some new tees at the Labor Day Sale starting'¦N-O-W.